Call me Blanche.

What happened to me?  Here I am up at 2:31 am with a yacking kid.  My 10 year old Zach has a mean cough. This is my life. It revolves around my children. It's nothing new.  Five years ago I was home on a Friday Night trying to stick a suppository up Zach's butt.  I remember sitting on my couch with Zach over my lap kicking and screaming... I think I was crying louder then he was.  9 years ago I was 8 months pregnant on bed rest because Mr. Solomon was trying to come early.  11 years ago I was ravaging through my trunk trying to find a clean pair of underwear so I can change out of my club outfit and go to work.   

What happened?  Don't get me wrong.  I LOVE LOVE LOVE my kids.  Everyone knows that.  I don't even want to think about my life without them.  I just miss some things.  Like my thighs not touching.

I have crossed that invisible line of looking young and fresh to being a true Golden Girl in my thirties.  Friday night I went to a karaoke bar and did not get carded once. (By the way... The Humpty Dance is a lot harder to sing then it might seem. FYI) I went to bed that night actually contemplating if i should use my only morning off in 4 months to sleep in or go garage sale hunting.  Exhibit C... I chose the garage sales.  (Why does every garage sale always have a Christmas tree stand for sale?)  The next old lady thing I did was blurt out an obnoxious comment which is something only old people do.  Example, grabbing a garment off of a rack and asking the vendor how much for the costume, only to find out it was a favorite dress.

I need to hit reverse. Meantime.. I accept my fate.  Call me Blanche.

Create your own FACEinHOLE


  1. Wasn't Blanche the one that still got down with her bad self?

  2. Oh Jackie, that picture! I am ROFLing!



  3. Um, Blanche was the "easy" one Jacks!


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